Thursday, June 9, 2011

Getting the Groove Back

So, today was my first real day of Day Patient, accident free and all.. So, I wanted to write a bit and post some Le Mansion pics that I illegally took on my final day of incareration.
Day is.. well Day. Except like multiplied by a gazzillion. The last time that I was on Day Patient, there were 5 of us. Today, we are a group of 17.. It is a tad nuts. It definately tests the imits of my addled PTSD'd, easily overstimulated brain.

Hougnou.... My NY girl for Life!

I saw W for a bit as she wanted to chack in and see what was going on with my accident and all.. First thing she said was, "What the Hell? Definately not what we planned for your first day out." Seriously... She wanted to know what was going on as a result of that.. I told ther that having my body hurt all over is making me remember trauma pain and is bringing up a bunch of big time emotions and memories. which is Major Sucko.

I must say that I miss my girls a lot. I get to see them, in passing to the Dining Room as such; but not enough.

My beautiful Roomie Erika

The Food Goddess decided to tell me today that I have about 2 weeks left of weight restoration. Which I suppose is both a good and a bad thing.
Good: not much time left
Bad: I feel like my body is in a place where I can be done NOW...
So lets just say that out little meeting didn't go so hot.

Room 17.. Party Room. Home of the
Cardigans and Mansion Clothes Store
My assignment for tonight... Is to write a letter to Jack as to what we are going to do for his next birthday. To apologize for breaking my promise and being in treatment instead of at home for his birthday and o give me "something to hold on and look forward to," in the hopes that my "passive suicidal ideation" will decrease.
blah blah blah...
I also found out the Timmy will be coming into my sesh tomorrow, to kind of give me some perspective as to why she has been completely non-communicative with me since I got to the Mansion. Hopefully it goes well. and that she and I can go back to being cool again.
if not... I just donno if I can keep going to her groups and passing her by in silence.
Wish me luck